3/1/25

sitting in Lincoln Park, alone, deep in the shade and gusts of wind on this March day. Across from me four girls, you’d think maybe sisters, but I know they are carbon copy besties. Directly across from me in the bright sunlight.

Is that what I yearn for?

Is that what I’m supposed to yearn for? No, I want to be in the path of the torturous wind, deep in the shadows alone. Another “lonely girl” has taken up her territory on the bench next to me. Not together, but knowing I am a safe place for her. There’s a stark difference between those of us that have chose the shade and those that have chosen the light. Do I love warmth of the sun? YES! But I also know the pay off of resisting, barring the cold, how much more the sun will feel like heaven then. Knowing darkness also means savoring the light.

No I want to sit here and write in my journal about the observations I make this sunny, Saturday morning, listening to The Loved One album. Some days I am a sunlight person. Even now, sunlight peeks through the leaves and touches me. The wind sings to me. As the days start earlier so do I.

Spring, spring, spring, new, new, new, rebirth, death, and change are the song the winds sing to me today. Which is why I’m here and not over there.

comfortable in the loneliness
safety in the shadows